How to destroy a working relationship: Ego
I recently read Ryan Holiday's book 'Ego is the Enemy', which I found very thought-provoking. If you're like me, you'd expect to understand the content of the book just by hearing the title, however, according to Ryan, that would be your ego talking.
Listening to all the stories of clients over the past few years, and thinking back over my own personal career challenges, disagreements with colleagues and growth struggles, I was struck by how much of it can relate back to ego being a central component.
When I started my career, I remember being too proud to do jobs that I felt were below me, frustrated with recruiters who didn't give me a second luck and disheartened when I wasn't given a high-status and well-paid job (without deserving it). I'd been to college and I deserved it!... right? Nope, sorry it doesn't work that way.
In the end, I was humbled into taking lower status jobs for small amounts of money, which gave me the opportunity to develop my skills going forward. It felt painful but it was the best thing that could have happened.
The book also prompted me to remember disagreements with a former colleague. He felt what happened was fair, I disagreed and subsequently shut down the communication channels between us (childish eh?), justifying it because I felt I was right (that's the ego talking again). Maybe I was (but looking back - I doubt it), maybe I wasn't, but ego stopped us from progressing with our work and had a terrible effect on our working relationship. It taught me a valuable lesson.
“Always put the relationshp first”
(Later I apologised for this immaturity on my side. He was the bigger man and accepted my apology, but unfortunately, the damage was done). People will not always remember what you say, but they'll remember how you made them feel.
Keep a learning log and a journal of your tasks
Ask lots of questions so that you get up to speed quickly
Find out what your KPIs are and what success in your role looks like
Figure out what the company and your team's objectives are for the next 6 months/year
Learn how your team likes to work and communication
- You might see people making videos, like me, or so-called experts, and think they've never struggled. And it's not true. - I couldn't learn quick enough - It's about responsibility, not blame
- Discuss it openly with your manager
- Outline your intention
- Understand their perspective - deeply. Avoid being defensive.
- Share your perspective - calmly. Admit wrongdoing if necessary.
- Express your commitment to progress and a resolution.
- Understand what will make it better and ask for support.
- Thank them for their time and understanding.
- Deliver on your commitment and ask for feedback.
Increase in brand awareness (e.g. social listening, website visits, in-person visits, market share). In a previous video, I spoke about how to emphasise your impact on increasing online sentiment through reviews, subscribers and likes. And in this video I’ll discuss underlining your impact on brand awareness if you’re in a business that sells products.
This is all about highlighting the marketing or promotional opportunities that you develop for the business or the relationships that you are able to leverage.
If your main job is sales, then you’d be expected to generate income for the business. But what about all those people who are involved in other areas, yet still manage to bring in new business. That’s very valuable and worth taking into account when speaking to a manager about a salary increase or a promotion.
How do you emphasize your contribution to increasing positive customer sentiment (e.g. online reviews)? And why is it important to do so?
If I asked whether you’d be more inclined to work with or buy something from a company or a brand that you liked, you’d probably say ‘of course I would’. According to Dr. Robert Cialdini, who is a professor of psychology and marketing, and author of a book called ‘Influence’, “liking” is one of the 6 key factors of persuasion.
With that in mind, if we can increase “liking” or the online reputation of a brand, that has a value because it’s going to influence customers/clients to engage in our services and it might lead to an increase in sales. So how do you calculate it?
How do you convey the value of your work and how your efforts are having a positive impact on your company/organisation?
Here are a couple of useful ways to understand what you have achieved and what you have contributed. They should primarily be used for acknowledging your own efforts, but could also be used for having respectful and professional conversations with your manager.
They should not be used in a moment of conflict or as any form of threat. That would be counterproductive - at least in my opinion.
Are you a subject matter expert that shares your expertise on an area outside of your role? Do you teach new skills to people on your team? Do you save your company money by providing in-house training? If so, do you ever consider how much that’s worth to your company? A simple way to express its value is to figure out how much it would cost to outsource it to another company.
Occasionally you might be concerned about losing your job. But you should also consider your commitment to the organisation. This is because it will take time to hire and train someone else, and it will take even longer for them to get up to the same productivity as you in the role.